Lois M King

I work with individuals/couples/groups/family.

With individuals the goal might be to better understand your relationships with others and your relationship with yourself. Would you like to make more sense of what happens in your relationships or why you behave the way you do in response to others? Or why your dating experiences seem to take the same path and you feel stuck in the same old patterns? Or how to even begin to date or form relationships? Do you feel scared, overwhelmed, ambivalent just thinking about it?  Would you like to work out what you want and need in your love life, and then devise a strategy to get there, with someone who understands all the worries, pit falls and difficulties that might arise?

I endeavour to help people release the shackles of shame that surround body, sex, intimacy, desire, arousal, and longing, by providing a warm, non judgemental, knowledgeable and REAL space where you can check out ANY and ALL ideas, desires/fantasies and questions. I am a sexual educator and not phased by anything you might bring.

I work with couples/groups/family members to deepen your understanding of what is happening between you, and how your individual life experiences impact your methods of relating to each other. 

How do each of you navigate the choice between authenticity and attachment? What parts of yourselves have you had to suppress to remain safe in relationships before? What was modelled to you in your early experiences in terms of what relationships, love, marriage and adulthood is meant to look like? How do you feel when you think of challenging that? 

Alongside this, I offer practical and tailored skills and tools to help you discover how to really hear, see and validate each other and discover a way to move forward. I draw on theories of non violent communication and mediation skills to help all parties work towards being able to express themselves fully, stay grounded and reachable, and tolerate differences between you. 

I respectfully and compassionately open up conversations about intimacy and sex where appropriate, and help you to learn a new shared language to help you discover/rediscover a vibrant, nourishing and connecting sex life.

I use a clinical sexologist approach to working with sexual dysfunction and related conditions like erectile dysfunction, vaginismus, general dyspareunia, endometriosis to name just a few. I also have experience of compulsive sexual behaviours and sex/love addiction.

I also offer mediation for couples wishing to split up so that the process can remain as amicable and stress free as possible, holding space for what has been lost, what needs to be achieved right now, and where life might take you next.